You know have lived...

There have been a lot of shared posts on Facebook recently about an article consisting of situations that follow the "you know you have lived in Qatar for too long when..." theme (Article link - "Fifteen signs you have lives in Qatar too long.") Loads of people have made lists like this and so after 20 plus years in the Middle East, I thought I would give it ago. Here is my very own... "You know you have lived in Qatar for too long when..." list. Feel free to comment with any that I have missed.

You know you have live in Qatar for too long when...

• You start saying YANI instead of LIKE.
• You see something in the store that is from America or the UK so you buy five (or 20) because you know it won't be there next time.
• You follow the Land Cruiser in the "new lane" so you get to the roundabout faster.
• You use your horn when it is not needed just because you can. However, please don't be the jerk 10 cars back at a red light that honks THE MINUTE the light turns green. You sir, are not helping.
• You can sing a long perfectly with the song that plays before the news on QBS. Da da dumm dilla dumm da da dum dilla dum - singing it now?
• You see a camel in the back of a truck and think - "wow that looks better than economy class on Qatar Airways."
• Seeing a sheep/goat in the back of a truck doesn't surprise you. Instead you think - "someone is having a feast tonight."
• You know to avoid malls on weekends/during Ramadan/nights. You go as early as you can because shopping is a task and no longer fun.
• You leave your car running when you are getting gas because it is way too hot to sit there without the AC blasting.
• You do not get mad anymore when you find out about something after it has happened. Maybe next time you will catch the event - inshallah.
• You know that bukra inshallah means something will never ever happen. You smile when someone just says inshallah because it is more reinsuring than bukra inshallah.
• You are not surprised when you realize that you have not once stopped at the stop sign near your house. Whoops. 
• You know which speed cameras are where, and when to slow down on what road.
• You flash your lights at the slow car in front of you, which politely means - MOVE OVER. Please note this is a regret of mine and I hate that I have done this.
• You are driving in another country and you realize that you are not following any rules. You park like an idiot, you are the only one speeding, you flash your lights at slow people, and you barely pause at stop signs. 
• You laugh at someone new because they actually use the name of an area and they don't say "you know, I live by post office roundabout" or "take your 2nd right after the big mosque."
• When it is hot and humid outside you turn your car on 10 minutes before you leave your house.
• You find it funny when you have a guest from another country visiting and they complain about waking up at dawn because of the multiple mosques around your house going off for the Morning Prayer. You stopped waking up to those a LONG time ago.
• A hot PINK matte *insert expensive car here* passes you and you look in only to see a GUY is driving it - nice color bro.
• You are shocked how much a car wash is back home because it should only cost 15 QAR.
• You then start complaining about how expensive everything is back home until you realize it isn't that cheap in Qatar either.
• Rain is a good thing. Joking! Rain in Qatar is only good because it cleans away the dust. When it rains people forget how to drive, places flood (once or twice when I was growing up we were sent home from school because the school was flooded), and people just act crazy.
• Weird things on menus don't faze you.
• It is acceptable for you to buy your weekend taxi driver a meal from Hardees on your way home from a night out.
• You start wishing you could wear an abaya because then you could wear your PJs to work.
• You find it funny that people back home think a sand storm automatically looks like a scene from "The Mummy."
• You leave your car running when you stop in at a corner store to grab a diet coke.
• You are not shocked by the people who honk outside a corner store because they are too lazy to get out, walk in, and grab what they need for themselves.